They’re singing “Deck the Halls,” but it’s not like Christmas at all for these celebrities spending the most wonderful time of the year in federal prison.
From Lori Loughlin to Joe Exotic, these stars are jingle bell rocking in their jumpsuits this holiday season, but the prison-industrial complex is providing them with one fragment of Yuletide delight: a Christmas meal.
TMZ obtained the prison menus for famous convicts across the nation, finding that many jailbirds will be feasting on a festive fowl this Chrimbo.
Disgraced “Full House” actress Lori Loughlin, 56, is set to dine upon Cornish game hen with pan gravy and roasted jerk roast beef with horseradish sauce at California’s low-security FCI Dublin. The college cheating scandal collaborator will also receive rice pilaf, a dinner roll with honey apple butter, Brussels sprouts with brown butter, pumpkin cheesecake, fresh fruit and a choice of au-gratin or baked potato. While decadent by lockup standards, the meal surely can’t compensate for the fact that she was nearly able to celebrate the holiday as a free woman.
Meanwhile, Loughlin’s husband, 57-year-old fashion designer Mossimo Giannulli, will be eating 4 ounces of roast beef, baked mac ‘n’ cheese, yams, green beans, two rolls, pecan pie and half a chicken at California’s USP Lompoc. Should he opt to go vegetarian, the medium-security penitentiary will serve up a 4-ounce soy chicken patty and a 4-ounce soy beef patty.
In Texas at FMC Fort Worth, “Tiger King” wild child Joe Exotic, 57, is set to consume cornbread dressing, mac ‘n’ cheese, sweet peas and pumpkin pie. Exotic — whose real name is Joseph Maldonado-Passage — additionally has the choice of baked Cornish hen or spinach quiche. He is currently one year into his 22-year sentence for violating the Endangered Species Act and falsifying wildlife records.
At New York’s Wende Correctional Facility, John Lennon’s murderer, Mark David Chapman, 65, will enjoy a meal of baked chicken breast, seasoned chicken gravy, whipped potatoes, seasoned zucchini with sauce, dinner rolls with margarine and, for dessert, an ice-cream sundae, TMZ reported. Chapman, who fatally shot the former Beatle outside his Manhattan apartment on Dec. 8, 1980, was denied parole for the 11th time this year.
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